Monday, April 21, 2008

Photo day

My faculty is redesigning the website. (This doesn't seem to be the wisest use of funds during a budget crisis - which I've not bloggged about - but whatever...) We all already have snapshots on our webpages, but those are being redesigned with new, professional photos. I had mine taken a couple of weeks ago, and today was sent a page of proofs to choose from.

Oh. my. god.

I am not usually high-maintenance about photos at all, but this is HORRIFYING. Horrifying. The thought of being represented by one of these shots makes me want to cry. Perhaps worst of all, I look like I have a rat's tail. Why didn't someone give me a mirror or tell me to fix my hair???

Les you think this is just me over-reacting, here is what R wrote when I emailed her the sheet of proofs:

"i'm so sorry, but they are the funniest things i've ever seen. (or maybe i'm just sleep deprived) I can't open the link without immediately convulsing with laughter. I've forwarded the email to my home address so I don't make a fool of myself here at work....sorry to be laughing at your expense, sweetie, but....thanks for the hilarity."



kermitthefrog said...

Can you refuse to use any of them? Either use the current snapshot, or just not have a photo up?

I can't even imagine how they'd be funny, unless you were crossing your eyes and sticking out your tongue, but you don't want a webpage you're embarrassed about!

Psychgrad said...

So far, I've refused all circumstances that would lead to me having my photo on the internet. It just kind of creeps me out.

Sarah Williams said...

I think you should post the link here and let us pick the best one. ;)

Belle said...

Take it and photoshop it yourself. Or substitute one. Or tell 'em you're a vampire and don't show up even on digital. That's simply not you!

Hilaire said...

All - I didn't refuse to use them, but I let them know how unhappy I was and asked that, in the "retouching" they say they are going to do, they at least get rid of the rat-tail hairdo.

Belle - I kind of love the idea of having it photoshopped myself. Well, I could get A to do it...Hmmm...

Psychgrad - I don't mind the idea of pics of me on the Internet, as long as they're not "compromising..." What is it about it that bothers you?

Sarah - Never never never never!! :)

I did decide there were two people who could see them. R, who "commiserated" as above. And my dear friend A., who is a photographer, one who loves to entertain herself with cheesy photos and Photoshop, and the funniest person I know. This is what she said:

"Oh my gawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwddddddddddddddd those don't do you justice in the SLIGHTEST, lady!!!!!!!!!!! Christ, you look like you just wrapped on the set of "Anne of Green Gables" or something. WHAT UP????

I guess they're living up to your moniker of 'hilaire'. Sigh.

The photographer was obviously on crack, what's with the baby diarrhea colour scheme and 10,000 square feet of useless background?

I mean, are they trying to redo the website to bring up to 1973 or something? That background colour seriously reminds me of the recreation of the 1960s departure lounge of the Vancouver Airport at the Museum of Civilization. Is it puce? I think it's puce. Taupe? Greige? One of those colours I never bothered to learn the name of because.... well.... why bother?

I feel an exceptional urge to play around with these in photoshop........:0)"

dbm/gaa said...

OMG - poor you but this post and comments are fecking hilarious!

Marcelle Proust said...

Like Psychgrad, I avoid having pictures of myself on the net. I don't want people I've never met able to identify me. It's a safety issue, and I present it to my school as such, and they accept that.

squadratomagico said...

I think nearly every picture taken of me for about 15 years was in the same category as your shoot, so I sympathize. How awful, though, to be forced to have it be so public.