Friday, April 25, 2008

Bullets of week

Thought I'd check in with some bullets..
  • My potluck for students the other night was a success. But many people in their early twenties appear to socialize by way of "storytelling contests," meaning that they don't actually talk with each other. They try to impress each other with stories about their lives. It's positively exhausting. The young ones held court while the three mature students and I just watched them, sort of incredulous. But people said they had a wonderful time.
  • But really, why do people go so overboard for potlucks?? I have a long history with people using potlucks as a kind of one-upping competition (in my Activity community, which was full of women who were excellent cooks), and it is a major pet peeve of mine. I even asked people, this time, to restrict the amount they were bringing...But still, some people brought two dishes. Gawd! What it meant is that I was left with a fridge full of weird food...
  • Things are really heating up with the co-edited collection. It has taken over my life this last week - I may as well be married to my collaborator, what with how frequently we're in touch. But I'm very happy with what's transpiring, and it tickles me, frankly, to be working collaboratively.
  • God, I love my PhD supervisor. I love what our relationship has become, and is still becoming. We are really very close. She means the world to me. We are having the most wonderful email exchanges lately. I'm so grateful for her.
  • This weekend I'm going to Nearest Metropolis for a day-long meeting tomorrow. Leaving later today, coming back on Monday. This makes me very, very happy. It makes me feel amazingly free.


Brigindo said...

I love the idea of a student potluck. I'm glad it was a success.

Have a lovely weekend of freedom.

Belle said...

I love it that you're still working with your mentor. I lost that, through my own insecurities. Then he was killed, and I lost even the option. So be sure and enjoy it while you have it.

Psychgrad said...

I do enjoy some level of experimentation at potlucks. But, one dish is enough of a(n)effort/stress/expense. I never do well in event-retelling conversations.

The collection sounds interesting. It's nice to work with someone who is as devoted to a project as you are.

Hilaire said...

Psychgrad - Oh, I don't mind experimentation at potlucks...go to town! It's quantity...I had way too many experiences where people brought, like, four dishes. Then you end up with a really frankly grotesque amount of food. It took me a long time to realize it was actually a competition. I realized when about 20-25 of us went away for a weekend. Every person or couple was assigned a dish - like "Sunday lunch dessert." Much of the food that people had brought that was scheduuled for later in the weekend - like my Sunday dessert, for instance - didn't even get touched because everyone else had gone so incredibly overboard making five times more delicacies than they were asked to. It was insanely competitive in this really passive-aggressive way. And then I realized that this had been a pattern for years. It bugs me a lot!

Hilaire said...

And Belle - that's really sad. :(

Psychgrad said...

I hear ya... I'm sure a lot of that is competition.

Though, in my family, bringing too much food is kind of a tradition. In these cases, I don't see it as competition. More an association between friendship/love and food.

People that go camping with me always laugh at the amount of food I bring. Just in case. No one should go hungry. For me, it's not a competitive thing. Probably more of an anxiety around food thing. I don't know. Jewish families tend to be a bit nuts about food. So..I'll blame my mother and grandmother.

Hilaire said...

It's funny you say that, because my mother's family totally, totally overdoes quantities of food, as well. It's kooky. But in her case, it's always felt as if it is simply a reaction to a large family (seven children). In some ineffable way, it feels very different from people deciding to make seven of the fanciest dishes they know...which is not about making sure people are fed, it's about showing off.