You know what worries me?
That I haven't written a test, or an exam, or many of the things I ask my undergraduate students to do, in many years. Many. years. Like, a dozen years for the tests and exams. More than that, actually. I don't even remember what it feels like, except that I remember once getting hives and a yeast infection at the end of my Theory Year, when I had the final exams in two difficult courses on the same day. Aced them and had my best year ever. And almost dropped out of university after that, because of my reaction to the stress.
That is an interesting thing, actually - that that is what I remember. Because many of my students feel the same way because of tests and exams that I give them. And yet I don't have a clue - not a clue - what the content of that feeling is.
It makes me feel bad. It makes me feel unaccountable, somehow.
But what am I going to do about it. I don't know. Make myself write an exam?